I was chatting to a good friend today and our conversation started me thinking about how we made it to certain places/stages in our lives. Compared to where we thought we wanted to go
When you’re a kid you have this picture in your head of what you want to be when you grow up; which we innocently act out by dressing up or role playing. Then in school, our focus is manipulated towards broader career choices based on our academic strengths. Those strengths become more concentrated as we start applying to universities and ultimately graduate in to a job connected to our degree subject or if you didn’t go to Uni, towards those subjects you were basically good at in school.
I’m curious to know who out there had the passion and dedication to stick with that initial first feeling of joy when you were role playing your ideal career choice and how many of you ended up somewhere you least expected.
I know that’s the case with me. I’ve ended up here by the forces of nature not by my own will. In fact I would go so far as to say I began lacking the will to be so determined whilst in school. I wanted to learn everything but had no interest in being good at any of those things. What actually happened was the more I found interesting the more indecisive I became. A trait that probably led me to allow fate to nudge me in other directions; although I’ve seen fate blatantly bullying people to go in the direction they don’t want to, such as those who aren’t fortunate enough to get a job in there related Uni/school subjects (again first-hand experience with that scenario), so with that in mind I’m quite content with just being nudged.
My mind only wonders in this direction now I’m older and wiser (debateable!) and find myself curious as to how my life would’ve been had I been more determined to bend fate to my will and the question; is it still possible?
I should point out that I am by no means miserable at this point, I’m merely musing. I just find the idea of your planned journey against your actual journey rather fascinating. Especially in light of the fact that when I was younger I never contemplated other aspects of my life. For example I was never interested in settling down, I was far too manic for stability and wanted to meet so many interesting people. Yet, here I am celebrating ten years of a relationship that completely blindsided me.
It is the strength of this relationship which makes me wonder if, now, I could make my make believe become a reality. Was the missing component to succeed all those years ago that piece that makes me whole now? Or is it a lost cause and those notions should be left in the hands of the younger minds.
If that’s the case should we stop dreaming? Do our old dreams hold us back now, unable to fulfil a different potential we’ve found through the unexpected path we took?
I think at the moment the answer to all the above questions is nobody knows. The best we can do is enjoy the journey in the moments we have and try to take something positive and educational out of every one of those moments. Most importantly respect our younger selves for once having that fearless attitude and dreaming so big in the first place because somewhere it’s still part of us.