Review Experiment Part 2

I did it, I have self published Ward Five to Kindle. Why? I hear you ask, It’s simple really. It is the best way of gaining reader feedback and exposure to a wider audience.

In January of this year, I had the best positive feed back I have had since I almost had a screenplay made for television when I was eighteen that sadly fell through due to funding. I had an offer from a publisher!

The offer, to start was a partnership offer, through my research this seems quite popular nowadays, in the ever changing world of publishing and the accessibility of peoples works. This approach makes sense to me, it means you take on some of the risk in costs whilst getting started. You are then released in a smaller area to gauge the audiences appetite and you build from there. The feedback I received from this publisher regarding the story of Ward Five was invaluable to me but the unfortunate reality was, it was badly timed, January was a busy month. My partner and I became parents, the car died and needed replacing. Actually, the car died on the way to the hospital when my partner was in labour but that is its own little story! And it meant i found myself in the situation where i just couldn’t realistically find or commit to the proposed fee, which in fairness appeared quite reasonable. So I had to decline the offer.

I started thinking, if i could get one offer I could get another but one of the things publishers seem to want is a crystal ball prediction that they’re on to a good investment. I can’t give them that, surely no-one can, but what if, I could at least build upon my small data set of feedback that I had gathered from my first review experiment. What if i could gain enough input from real readers, real everyday people, not just a person sat in an office projecting personal preference on to a manuscript. Hence reason 1 as to how I ended up pursuing another self published project.

Reason 2 is a little more personal and is kind of two fold. I never self promote to people I know, it’s this little hang up I have, I get embarrassed and don’t want to look like an idiot to people who matter to me and in some cases to people who don’t even matter to me, it’s one of my vulnerabilities where peoples opinions mean something. So, for the most part, I keep it hidden and don’t talk about the passion I’ve had since I learnt to read and write. I envy friends of mine who share their passions so energetically, positively & confidently. I think of one in particular, who is a great musician and likes to share his new compositions with me to get an opinion, he does Instagram live sessions singing his own material and no he is not famous or a professional, although I believe like me with writing, that would always be the dream. I admire him for that confidence to be able to put him and his work out there in the ways he does, I wish he could bottle it and sell it to me.

And then, there is my sister who has struggled immensely with Anxiety and then this week, she posted this on her Instagram

For those that are now squinting at their screens it reads:

“The brightest star in the room can be the one who hurts the most. Since January I have struggled with my panic attacks more than ever I have had therapy, missed endless days of work, scratched my face and stomach to shreds trying to breathe. Yet still I had an interview got a promotion throughout all of this. I’ve shown the world how I love to sing and if you don’t know me personally you would have no idea. Remember the biggest smiles can hide a thousand fears”

You will also notice that there’s hashtag #mentalhealthawarenessweek which links me to the second part of my reason two. It is the main theme that runs through this story, it affects everyone you know and everyone you don’t and in this weird point in history whilst we’re all in lock down it is affecting everyone in the most profound ways. So, Mental health awareness week in the UK seemed like a no brainer to me, to attempt to both over come my own fears and anxieties and share this story in this way.

Paperback Version

So please have a read, write a review. It is only

Kindle Version

available on Kindle at this moment in time, please ignore the cover of the Kindle version its only temporary until I decide whether to release the paperback or if, judging by the reviews i just need to go back to the drawing board on the entire story!

It’s started….. the nerves

BLOG 1I’ve done it, I’ve started the, approaching agents process. It’s strange, I feel incredibly sick!! I actually feel like I do before a job interview. Which is crazy because I’m not going for an interview. I’m not talking directly to these individuals. I’m simply sending a covering letter, synopsis and the first three chapters of my new project, Ward Five. (I know, I’ve revealed nothing about it to you guys until now and for now that’s all you’re getting, the Title!!)

So why do i feel so nervous? If I had to guess I would say it is because of the nature of the work. It is not Fantasy/Sci-fi which we all know I geek over as a way of life. It is just normal life stuff, no other worlds, no special powers, no weird creatures. Just regular human beings, a drama I guess, very different to my self published works of The Break and Concordia. They were an element of my imagination and fun; Ward Five is my heart.

I would say the experience of self publishing has taught me a significant amount, not only about the process of publishing but about my writing. Ward Five has allowed me to use a different voice for the protagonist that i would never has normally have chosen. It allowed me to know them more and this has made me a better writer. Even I see, not only a new style to my writing, but a higher quality.

I will revisit fantasy again at some point but I thought to be a good writer, you should be able to explore different genres and different styles. Find your own voice as well as your characters.

I think that’s why I feel nervous putting it out there to be judged by agents because it means something to me and it should. Everything that makes you feel passion, should mean something to you.

I just wanted to update you all on where I’m at. Watch this space for more updates, maybe even a snippets of Ward Five or maybe just ranting and off loading about all the rejections that inevitably come with this process. There’s going to be some some blood and tears on the way folks.

As always thanks for reading!!!